Just a toddler

My father turned away

While my mother hurt me

Then they both looked at me

Expecting love

Terror seized me

Who were they

Treating me well one minute

Hurting me the next

Betrayal

Pain

Isolation

Fear

Were my constant companions

I felt my parents

Felt their moods shift

I withdrew deep inside

To protect myself

From

My father’s lack of care

My mother’s violent mood swings

No one to turn to

Nowhere safe to land

I thought I was going to die

Then as a teenager

Living in a safe friend’s house

I was rejected

Thrown out

For simply being myself

Not fearing to show sadness

I trusted them

And they too abandoned me

Left me

A high school student

With nowhere to go

Shocked

I had no foundation to fall back on

I was alone

Why? Why didn’t they love me?

I wondered

I pulled myself up

Continued on

Through it all

I survived

Somehow I survived

Until adulthood

When I could reach out

Learn to trust

Who was good for me

Learn to build

Solid relationships

Don’t let your past

Dictate your future

You are the architect

Of your life

Use your past

To help you make better decisions

About what relationships

To form now

About how to live fully

And freely

Your future is yours to create

Love yourself enough

To create a rich dynamic life

You are not your past

Embrace the present

Build a solid future

Based on self love and self care

You are worth it

You deserve a healthily connected life

You deserve all the good life has to offer

Love yourself and

Let others love you

Om Ah Hung

• Self Alchemy Seeker